Fibro Fog is a pain in the…?

Do. I. Even. English?  Words. I. Say. What. Are. Those?

(I call it the CPT Kirk Syndrome)

** Hey look! I made a meme! **

 

Writer with Fibro Fog

Some examples of writing with Fibro Fog are;

  • Writing this way is like digging my way out of quicksand. Once you finally dig out the correct word or sentence, you’re too exhausted to try it again… but you do.
  • Anyone who has ever tried writing anything with a messed up memory, or on strong medications, is basically into S & M for the brain. The pleasure and pain of writing something really good is addicting.
  • When I’m in deep Fibro Fog, or on pain medications, I write like CPT Kirk after a few bottles of Romulan Ale.
  • I use Google like a guest on Family Feud or Jeopardy, “Something to read you would normally find in a Doctor’s office?” “What is a magazine?”
  • I literally just used Google to write this one short blog to look up, “What is the game show hosted by the guy named Steve?” and “What is the illegal drink on Star Trek?

If I ever do publish a book, the publisher will need a team of editors just to decipher what the hell I’m writing.

Well, I’m off to write more gibberish and max out my Goggle searches.

 

As always… Be safe, be kind, and always be happy!

 

RA, Fibro, & CFS! OH MY!

I finally woke up feeling half way decent today. Not as much pain as yesterday and my head is clearer. Let’s see how long this one holds. I might get some cleaning done today… or not. 🙂

RA and Fibro are the strangest animals (especially when combined with CFS).

 

Fibro Pain 2

Imagine waking up one day and you have the flu. You are achy, tired, feverish, sick, headaches, etc. Then, a few days later you wake up, and you can feel the flu “break.” You have a little energy, your mood is better, and your pain is a little lower. Each day after you feel a little better, and pray like hell you don’t go through that again anytime soon.

Well, RA is kind of like the flu, except, it comes back over and over. Not only that, but RA makes Fibro flare up really bad, and the only thing you wish to do is lay in bed with ice packs and heating pads, eating soup and crackers.

Ughh…. It sucks so bad because you never know when one of those down times are going to hit or how long it will last. The constant changing weather certainly doesn’t make it any better.

Putting together RA, Fibro, and CFS, is like getting the flu, after being run over by a truck, beat by a baseball bat, dropped from a bridge, and being forced to stay up for 72 hours, all while on fire, then being forced to participate in life with a smile on your face…… while on fire.

 

Fibro Pain 1

 

I’m not sure who has my VOODOO doll, but I swear whatever I did to piss you off, you can stop poking me now, and stop it with the fire already! DAMMIT… while you are pulling at my hair, at least take the time to scratch my back…. yea… a little to the left…. oh yea baby, Right there!

 

Voodoo Doll Pain 1

 

As always… Be safe, be kind, and always be happy!

Spring time has arrived (March 20, 2016) … but no one told Mother Nature

Here we are in the Good Ole Rocky Top state with Spring finally on us. We are cleaning our yards and preparing our gardens, but Mother Nature has not kicked Jack Frost out of bed yet. Jack Frost is like a bad date. He showed up one night when Mother Nature was having a weak moment, she fed him ate breakfast, and months later, even when the conversation has become strained, he will not leave. He has icicles everywhere, even hanging in the shower, the cat is not happy about the cold belly rubs he gives her, and honestly, any intimate time with a man who can break at any moment, has becoming tiring. How many times can he sing jack Frost songs anyway?!

Well, Mother Nature, it’s time to hand Jack Frost an iced cup of coffee, his bags, and a muffin (because we aren’t animals, are we? ) and show him to the door. He needs to find somewhere else to reside and cause chaos for the next 6 months. I hear the snow ladies in Antarctica are looking for a cool guy to hang with for a few months. I’m sure ole Jack will do just fine living in the snow caves  and bring them lots of stories of his time in the Northern Hemisphere. So, off you go Jack, see you next year.

Back to our Spring and Mother Nature. Come on lady, get it together. There are plenty of men who would love to pollinate your flowers and tumble in the hay. You just need to warm up that cold heart and let us live!

I really need for you to wake up! I’ve got tomatoes which are calling my name!

This is what we are supposed to look like now…..

 

Spring time is here!

 

I’m saddened to say, this is actually what we look like! Our wonderful Mother is very confused with what date it is. Someone needs to let her know I do not want to freeze on Easter Morning!

Spring in TN is confused

I love the sunshine! I’m like a flower! I need sun to blossom and become bright and cheerful again! I don’t want any more cold days!!

I’m routing for you Mother Nature! You can do it! I need you! We need you!! Everyone needs you!! Show us your sweet face and your touch of grace!

My old bones are counting on it!

 

As always… Be safe, be kind, and always be happy!

 

 

Retire to the Philippines – Become an Expat

With the elections in the US, and unrest throughout the world, many people are looking for a new adventure or even a new place to call their permanent  home.

One of the great places to retire is the Philippines.

The Philippines offer’s great medical service, including Veteran’s care for the US military.

There are many wonderful beaches. With more than 7000 islands, you can spend your day swimming, diving, fishing, sailing, hiking, or just relaxing.

Banking isn’t an issue. You have plenty of ways to process money from one country to the other.

Housing is modern and built with storms in mind. Plus, there are many neighborhoods specifically designed for Ex-pats. The homes will include a variety of all the modern conveniences we have in the United States, to include AC, Heat, internet,  and cable TV. But who is going to be home all the time, when you have an entire new country to explore. Fishing, swimming, and late night family parties are normal activities.

If you are craving some night life, there are plenty ways to have a great time in the cities and shop in local malls.

If you wish to learn more about moving and living in the Philippines, or going for an extended holiday, be sure to contact my friends; Mary Rose  and Eli van Ingen.

My friend and her husband are Retirement Ambassadors for the Philippines. If you want to know more, she can help you get the paperwork you need.

Here are the photos of them at the recent International Retirement Conference held in Berlin.

 

 

These two are Travel GURUS. They travel the world and have become experts on airlines, hotels, trips, and where to retire for your future.

If you are serious about retiring to the Philippines,  please contact them at their various social media pages.  She enjoys introducing new people to her home country.

Here is her page directly dealing with Visas and Requirements —

http://www.vaningenmanagement.com/index.htm

Here is her official Retirement Ambassador Page.

https://www.facebook.com/Retire-in-The-Philippines-143521…/…

 

As always… Be safe, be kind, and always be happy!

 

 

 

Frida Kahlo and Pain

Today has been shit. Just shit. I spent two days going like crazy, then I spent two days with my brain screaming out in pain. Of course, I don’t scream. If I screamed the way I felt, someone would lock me away in a shiny new room, with pretty white walls. So, I write.

My writing might be crap on days like this, but mostly I’m able to pull together a few sentences which adhere to the English language. It’s always a struggle. I want to write coherently, but it’s either I’m sleepy from medications or in pain because I did not take the medications on time. That balance always leaves me frustrated and pissed off.

Hello, Fate! This was not the future I planned for, and it sure wasn’t the body I wanted. I want an exchange.

One of the fun things I really do enjoy is looking at art. I’ve always admired how other humans can put together colors in what seems like random spots, yet, in the end it turns out so perfectly.

Two of my favorite artists are Van Gogh and Frida Kahlo. They inspire me when I feel my worst. I have to remember, even when they felt nothing but pain, agony, and shame, they produced great works of art, which are breath taking. I may never be a Van Gogh or a Frida, but I can admire their work and draw inspiration from their stories and their work.

Just for the record, I feel like this today……

 

Frida Kahlo

There is pain, then there is PAIN! The constant change of the weather is pulling and pushing my inner body in ways which feel like some mid-evil torture chamber. Sometimes I think if there were no weather changes, I could face the constant drum of pain, then I remember, there is no place without weather changes, and this is going to be my life, day in and day out.

So, I go to sleep. In my dreams I hope and pray the weather does become nicer in time. I can only hope my pain decreases from this scream to a manageable roar.

Until then, I will somehow put words together in coherent sentences, and call it writing. Maybe Frida and Vincent would be proud.

Until next time….. Be safe, be kind, and always be happy.

 

 

Protesting in America

Protesting in America;

 

TBT - Me in DC 2010

One of the things I miss, from being younger, is protesting.

Not just the whole POTUS protesting thing. I probably wouldn’t go to one of those. But I would gladly get vocal on local causes or state causes.

There is a feeling I love about not only having the right to stand up for something I believe in, but also getting out and holding signs and letting my voice counts.

Some people might think it’s a waste of time, or it looks silly standing on the Capitol steps, or even a Town Hall steps, holding signs for random causes, but to me it’s a pretty awesome feeling.

As long as we are peaceful about it, It’s one of the acts, as Americans, we can get out and do, and not worry about being hunted down, or arrested for our voice.

I know America is in a mess at the moment, and we are all over the news for crazy stuff during protests, but the world doesn’t see the small groups standing in front of the court houses, the lone protester standing by their home, or a group of young mother’s standing on the state capitol steps, letting the politicians know what they want in their area.

Those are the photos and the films which should be shown to the world. Those are the people who make the real change in everyday communities, cities, and states. That is what it means to be American.

It shouldn’t be about race, sex, or class, it should be about making America better for everyone. Making a country better for everyone, isn’t going to look the same for everyone, and this is where peaceful rallies and protests come in. I don’t care if someone agrees with my stance on an issue or not, but I do care if they have the right to voice their opinion in a legal manner.

I may not agree with someone, but I will fight for their right to voice their opinion just as loudly as I will voice mine.

Now that the weather is warmer, I need to get out and support a rally and join a protest. I need to take lots of photos of even the smallest rallies, so the world can see how regular everyday people are accomplishing huge things, even with the smallest voices.

So, the next time you want to change something, the next time you disagree with something, or the next time you see someone being treated ugly and unfairly, let your voice be heard. Create a FB page, write a letter to the editor, and always keep some poster board around, and make a sign!

When the smallest voices are allowed to be heard, that is America.

 

Until next time….. Be safe, be kind, and always be happy.

 

 

I don’t have a flipping clue what I’m doing

Can we all just agree I have no clue what I’m doing? Not just with WordPress, but with life, writing, retirement, hell, I can’t even figure out what I want to eat for breakfast anymore.

Okay. WordPress really is giving me a headache tonight, but that was just the straw which broke the camel’s back.

My whole life I’ve been secure in who I was, what I was, and where I would be at this point in my life. Yea. That shit flew out the window a few years ago and I’ve been flapping around on the dock ever since.

I know. I know. I’m middle aged and I must be facing the dreaded mid-life crises. Well, whatever the hell it is, I don’t like it. I thought I could avoid it. Hell no. This crap has hit me in the face with all the sagging arms, chicken chins, and wrinkled skin you could imagine. I went to bed one night, really cool and hip. I woke up the next morning with a house dress on, floppy shoes, grey hair, and the ability to sneeze with my legs crossed so tight, I could flatten a quarter. What the actual hell is up with that? Wisdom my ass. I want my body back. While we’re at it. I would like the ability to drive more than 2 hours without stopping at every rest stop. Forget driving cross-country, I can’t even make it to the next town without stopping for a snack, a bathroom break, and asking for directions at least 3 times just to exit the damn parking lot.

A few of the things I have discovered over the last few years include; I’m not as smart as I thought I was, I’m not ever going to fit into a size 12 again (nor a 14), and red wine gives me a headache. Oh. To top it off, I’ll probably die a cat lady and when the police find my body, I’m sure one of the cats will have feasted on my face. The whole “cat eating my face off” actually doesn’t bother me as much as the fact I will probably be found naked (after falling out of the shower or something), and my death will be one of those stories told to rookies for years to come.

It will be the briefing where they tell the rookies not to upset the old fellow in the corner too much, because he still has flashbacks to the old, bloated, naked, cat lady he found, 2 weeks after she was dead, broken from her bathroom fall, with her face eaten off by her favorite feline.

See, that’s not how I want to be remembered. Geez. Let me pass away having really great sex or something. Let the police tell the story of the 80 year old woman passing away in the bed of her young lover. Anything would be better than being remembered as the lady who gets her face eaten off my her cats.

Where was I? Oh yes. Mid-life crises. WTH? So, here I am. I know everything there is to know about the Army. I can quote regulations, make the best spreadsheets and power-points seen on planet Earth, I know how to fight, shoot, and plan all the troop movements any Risk player would need to win the cold war. Then it all ends.

Retirement. Now I’m trying to learn what the hell a Twitter is (news flash, not a bird), how to use a blog (not where you would find mud – I know. It’s “bog”), and what the hell is up with all the new phones? Must we have a new phone every year? Why does every new phone come with different cables? Hell. I finally learned to use my old phone and acquire enough cables that I have one in each room, car, and even a solar charger. What the hell am I supposed to do with all these cables now? Is it really so flipping hard for the phone makers (Apple, I’m looking at you) to make new phone without requiring we invest our life savings to replace all the cords needed to run these things? Let’s not forget the covers? I finally had a cover I loved. Now I need a new cover. What the hell is up with that? I guess Amazon is really going to love me when I am done trying to upgrade from my 5 year old phone to this new one.

Oh, don’t worry. I’m not sponsored by either Apple, nor Amazon. Those just so happen to be the only two companies I know how to use at all, so they are the only ones I can speak about in any sort of way that doesn’t sound like a 5 year old. Never-mind, scratch that. 5 year old children know more about this tech stuff than I do.

Okay. Back to the point of this post. As a way to have free post-retirement therapy , I started a blog 1.5 years ago, and switched to WP damn near 1 year ago (around March 20, 2015). I figured who better to give me therapy ideas than the people who blog everyday, and work their feelings out with each other. Like group therapy in your PJs. Well, as soon as I switched over to WP, I lost a few followers, and even lost some of my blog entries. They weren’t that great anyway, so no big lose. But the entries I made here were somewhere fun and open. Now, some of them are messed up.

While look back over my archived blog entries, I realized some of them are missing, deleted, or the photos are no longer work because I did not format the entry correctly or upload the photos correctly. Please bare with me, if you see huge gaps in my previous year blogging, it’s because I was too stupid to know how to use WP on a regular basis, I couldn’t remember by password and I was too tired to figure it out, or, due to my own blogging and format errors, I’ve had to go back and make some of my prior entries private. Those blogs aren’t fit for man or beast at the moment. It will take me some time to fix them, if I fix them at all. We may be stuck with just going forward with what I had and fixing a few hear and there when I have time. Until then, let’s get back to my original issue.

What is a divorced, middle-aged, woman supposed to do when her plans went complete off the rails? Well, I guess I need to find a different set of tracks and a different train to ride on. Sounds very poetic doesn’t it? It isn’t. I’m dreaming of another life, and I’m trying to convince myself not to chunk it all out the window, become a hobo, and grab the midnight train to no where.

It sounds very romantic until reality sets in. There’s a few issues with that plan. I’m warm where I am, my cat makes me happy, I like my bed, and I really like indoor plumbing. Either I’m becoming senile, or I have figured out middle age isn’t so bad after all. I have the modern convinces of home, which are nice and comfy, and I have coffee here. Yep. I do believe the idea of middle aged is settling in just fine.

There seems to be one more issue. I’ve got to make this 40 something brain work on 5 year old equipment. The learning curve is overwhelming on some days. I will have to knock it out little by little. …. or throw it out the damn window and start over. Learning it is cheaper. I need to save the tech money for possible new wheelchairs, walkers, beds, you know, those kind of silly toys old folks need. I really want a sports car at 80, so we’ll see. Wheelchair or sports car? Let’s hope fate love me. Until the time I’m in a wheelchair, or in a medical bed, I still have a very long way to and I need to figure out these crazy issues with  my WP.

I swear, before I figure it out, I really think this thing is going to force me to take up drinking. Anything other than cheap red wine will be OK.

Until next time….. Be safe, be kind, and always be happy.